I become immobile 

to savor 

incidental touch 

my kid is standing on my 

foot, and I’m like, 

don't move

at bedtime, my son wants to sword fight 

with hot wheels tracks, 

and I give in just a little 

I swipe 

halfheartedly 

against his all-out attacks 

I feel a little overwhelmed, 

and then realize 

I can tolerate even more chaos 

when someone wants to show 

me something on their phone, 

I’m like, no 

wow, all your problems 

have the same root cause? 

that’s crazy 

everything wrong with me 

is wrong for different reasons; 

none of it is connected

I quickly take off a t-shirt 

with a too-small neckhole 

and my face gets all squished 

I hug a person who, in retrospect, 

was reaching their arm out 

with some other intention 

I don’t hug someone I haven’t seen in 

months who walks up and stands 

an inch away 

I tell my boss “good!” 

before he asks how I am 

which he never winds up doing 

haven’t heard from a friend 

in a while, so I text, 

“u surviving?” 

haven’t heard back, 

didn’t really plan ahead, 

don’t know my next move 

before falling asleep I lose feeling in my 

legs and can’t remember 

if they’re straight or crossed 

I write “groceries” 

on my grocery list— 

must have meant “apples” 

wish you could have felt 

the medicinal sea breeze 

on my way into work today

catching myself subconsciously rooting 

against the thing I want to happen

secretly judging you 

because your teeth are too nice 

in the mood 

to get a really stupid tattoo 

trying to enjoy 

my headache 

feeling a bit of 

a spiritual hankering 

debating whether to cultivate 

a new interest or hobby 

eating a lot of chocolate 

and then kind of waddling around 

finding a couple cool things 

in spam 

dying doing what I love 

driving up i-95 eating a spicy mccrispy 

deftly incorporating a setback 

into my personal narrative of progress